What leaders must do to stop bullying [Wise Wednesdays]

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It always pains me when a client tells me they’ve been subjected to bullying.

 

Particularly as I know how hard they work and how caring they are. They were often just unlucky in coming across a leader or colleague who has sociopathic tendencies or is acting out for unclear reasons.

 

I’ve experienced harassment and it shook me to my core.

 

Bullying pushes you into a defensive and eventually a helpless state. You start to doubt yourself and your sense of reality. The NHS includes the following as bullying:

 

·       arguments and rudeness, but also more subtle behaviours like:

·       excluding and ignoring people and their contribution

·       overloading people with work

·       spreading malicious rumours

·       unfair treatment

·       picking on or regularly undermining someone

·       denying someone's training or promotion opportunities

 

You might also have your resources (team, office space, budget) taken away from you for no clear reason, as a highly respected scientist in an elite US university related to me last week in a coaching conversation.

 

 

LEADERS HAVE A MORAL RESPONSIBILITY AGAINST BULLYING

 

In the 21st century psychological violence in the work place should be as inadmissible as physical violence.

 

 

Leaders who stand by and turn a blind eye to bullying within their teams are no less responsible that those who are bullies themselves.

 

If the wider organisational culture enables bullying, individual leaders must stand up to it and protect their teams – not their jobs.

 

As philosopher and liberal politician Edmund Burke put it “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”

 

 

A HOLDING ENVIRONMENT

 

We know what helps team and people perform well:

-       Psychological safety

-       Team dependability

-       Clear structure and tasks

-       Meaningful work

-       Opportunities for impact and contribution

 

Leaders who ignore this are neglecting their duty of care to their teams.

 

Gianpiero Petriglieri is an associate professor of organizational behavior and leadership at INSEAD as well as a medical doctor and psychiatrist by training. He makes a compelling case that leaders have to provide a “holding environment” which he develops from psychologist Donald Winnicott’s insightful work.

 

A holding environment creates sufficient trust and safety (i.e. psychological safety) for individuals to perform at their best. It doesn’t have to be perfect but good enough and has clear parallels with physical safety which we rightly expect as a bare minimum in the workplace today.

 

Petriglieri argues that if the wider organisational culture doesn’t offer a holding environment, leaders have to step in to counterbalance the effects on their teams.

 

 

FILLING THE LEADERSHIP GAP

 

I, like my clients, have sometimes chosen to fight and sometimes chosen to leave toxic situations. Why? Because we know our true worth, that life is too short and that there are always new possibilities.

 

Leadership is not a title, it’s courage. I believe that having the title without having courage makes the “leader” a puppet.

 

In the meantime, you may have to be the leader you wish you had and protect yourself from further erosion of your core self-worth.

 

Live to fight – no, thrive - another day.

 

 
[REMINDER] WISE WEDNESDAYS LIVE: @4PM UK TODAY!

Join me at 4pm UK on Zoom again for Wise Wednesdays Live! 

[Zoom link: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/87935567991]

 

We’ve had CEOs of multibillion dollar companies, doctors passionate about mental wellbeing, academics and organisational psychologists from different countries on the call.

 

Last week, we explored how to balance belonging to an organisation while retaining your autonomy and independent spirit.

 

The theme of reinvention came up.

 

This week, we’ll look at what options we have when facing challenging situations. I’ll share a few key ideas and then open up to answer any questions.

 

It’s not recorded to create a sense of psychological safety.

 

[But I made a 1.15min video explaining what Wise Wednesdays Live is]

Watch the video here >>

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKhjmK-EysM



 


Take part in the exchange and bring your questions on careers, leadership and the liberated mind (and the independent life)! It's a relatively small group so you'll likely get your question answered.

Join me today, Wednesday 5th at 4pm UK for 30 minutes on Zoom:
Click here to join the call at 4pm UK.

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/87935567991
 
Keep well and see you soon,
 
Amina

 

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